Pedantic Perspective Watches: Gakusen Toshi Asterisk eps. 13 and 14

The second cour of everyone’s favorite magic high school battle harem is back! But seriously, this is actually a good show for the genre it’s in. Highlights of our commentary include:

• AiLied not being able to tell characters’ genders
• What Dirk Nowitzki did after retiring from basketball
• Kelloggs’ speculation on what lewd activity Julis does alone
• A criminal lack of Claudia

Episode 13

PumpkinMochi: Oh, it’s the Chinese loli.

AiLied: I think that’s a guy.

PumpkinMochi: No, that’s a loli, dude.

AiLied: I think Hundred broke my “Is it a guy” radar.

Keidence: You scrubs!

AiLied: This is all Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon.

Kelloggs: Smug loli is a good aesthetic.

AiLied: That orange-haired girl is pretty hot though.

PumpkinMochi: Are you sure they’re a girl?

AiLied: Yes.

PumpkinMochi: Okay…

AiLied: Oh my god.

Kelloggs: What?

AiLied: My radar is totally broken, that’s a guy. I just looked it up.

PumpkinMochi: Told you.

Kelloggs: I’m not gonna lie, you guys. I’m actually hyped that this is back. Like whatever, it’s magic high school light novel shit but it’s fun, I like this show.

Keidence: Yeah, I do think this is the best one we’ve had in a while.

Keidence: That face.

Kelloggs: Oh god, Jie Long’s student council president is nine years old.

AiLied: Well body-wise, I think it’s one of those “I’m an ancient loli” type of things.

Kelloggs: It says she’s nine here, so I dunno.

Kelloggs: We Tiger and Bunny now.

Kelloggs: Is is just me or when he did that sword move, did his face look like…

Keidence: Prison School?

Kelloggs: No, it’s like… shit, what was it… Oh, Sidonia.

Keidence: Oh right, I can see that.

AiLied: I really hope the rest of this season isn’t just this tournament, that would make me sad.They gotta make it to that next tournament.

Kelloggs: With blackjack and hookers?

AiLied: No, it was what Claudia was saying last season about how she wanted him on her team.

Kelloggs: What you’re saying is that you want more Claudia.

AiLied: Basically yeah.

AiLied: They look like they’re in their twenties, they don’t look like high school students.

Kelloggs: Yeah, they’re using ringers.

Kelloggs: Don’t stand in the flame strike!

Kelloggs: There’s too much talking in this fight. Less talky, more stabby.

AiLied: One Punch Man!

Kelloggs: Haha, he does have that look right now, doesn’t he?

AiLied: The girl’s pretty hot actually.

Kelloggs: I like her keyhole uniform.

PumpkinMochi: Hey, remember us? We exist!

Kelloggs: Kirin’s here!

Everyone: What.

Kelloggs: The flower girl from To-Love-ru grew up and became that.

PumpkinMochi: Yeahhhhhhhhh!

 

Episode 14

Kelloggs: Okay, this is off to a good start.

Kelloggs: Ahhhhhhhh.

PumpkinMochi: Have you progressed past maid training school, Kelloggs?

Kelloggs: I don’t know what you’re talking about, Mochi.

Kelloggs: Oh right, I forgot about that.

Keidence: Oh yeah…

PumpkinMochi: Yeah, that was her motivation.

Kelloggs: Booooooring! Get to the good stuff, tell us her secrets. Tell us how she’s constantly masturbating and screaming Ayato’s name.

AiLied: Well she hasn’t been home since she met him.

Kelloggs: Oh, she hasn’t?

AiLied: No, that’d be kinda weird.

Kelloggs: Maybe she’s been stalking him since he was a kid and went to this school to meet him. The orphan thing is just a cover.

Kelloggs: Oh here’s the good stuff.

Kelloggs: Dun dun dun!

PumpkinMochi: And they all look at him.

Kelloggs: I don’t know what’s going on here, derp.

Kelloggs: In before Claudia.

Keidence: Yeah, I feel like there’s someone in here.

Kelloggs: This feels like a Claudia scene.

Keidence: Why would he want that?

AiLied: Because she’s awesome.

Kelloggs: No, Priscilla’s better.

AiLied: Ehhh.

Kelloggs: Like the basketball player? Nowitzki?

PumpkinMochi: Yeah.

Kelloggs: This is actually just a plot to talk to Dirk Nowitzki.

Keidence: Sounds like a harem member to me.

Kelloggs: Oh crap, gap moe.

Kelloggs: Tsun!

 

PumpkinMochi: Oh, it’s Dirk Nowitzki! He kinda let himself go after retiring from the NBA though.

Kelloggs: That’s how you know it’s good. If your face isn’t covered with ketchup afterwards, you’re doing it wrong.

Kelloggs: Oh hey, it’s the Wagamama girls!

AiLied: Oh, I don’t recognize them with their clothes on.

Kelloggs: What about the orphans? This money could be going to them but you’re blowing it on parfaits! What the fuck.

PumpkinMochi: No, she’s getting energy from eating it so that she can go save the orphans.

Keidence: Ahaha.

Kelloggs: Yup.

Keidence: Better make a scene, that’ll fix it.

Keidence: Her hair has ears.

Kelloggs: And she also wears glasses. This is good.

PumpkinMochi: Didn’t she have fortune telling powers or something?

AiLied: I think she did like one thing last season. Otherwise she was being all uguu around the fat guy.

Kelloggs: Wow racist. I can’t believe you assume she has fortune telling powers just because she’s a… um… whatever she is.

PumpkinMochi: What are you trying to say?

Kelloggs: I’m just saying you’re racist, okay?

AiLied: That doesn’t even make sense.

Keidence: And she’s captured.

PumpkinMochi: That’s how you know it’s the future. The limo has glowing lights on it.

AiLied: Dude, those rims.

Keidence: So they’re going to the Grid.

AiLied: Her boots are so hot, they’re like… boot ZR.

Kelloggs: Ohhh, boots. I thought you said boobs and was like “Her arms are crossed over, you can’t really see them.”

 

PumpkinMochi: Wait, they lied! We didn’t get any Claudia this episode.

Keidence: I bet she’s gonna say that in the preview. “I lied, I wasn’t here this episode.”

PumpkinMochi: Noooooooo!

AiLied: Claudia denied!