Pedantic Perspective Watches: Saijaku Muhai no Bahamut ep. 03 and 04

There’s still not much going on in this show so far, but at least Krulcifer is good. The second season of Asterisk can’t come soon enough, as least stuff happened in that show and the fights were better.

Our commentary this time includes:

• Way too many boob-related jokes
• Topical humor about Donald Trump
• Speculation that Krulcifer might be a trap
• Evil Edward Elric

Best girl

Episode 3

Kelloggs: They didn’t throw a party for me when I started school!

PumpkinMochi: Well, you weren’t the only guy in an all-girls school, were you?

Kelloggs: That was my mistake.

Kelloggs: Fluffy’s here! Even though she has pink hair, she’s eating food and not eating dicks. I’m okay with this.

PumpkinMochi: I’m just saying that she can’t wait to put something in her mouth.

Kelloggs: As long as it’s food, it’s fine.

AiLied: This bothered me. They have fucking beer in school.

Kelloggs: You didn’t?

PumpkinMochi: That’s just juice.

AiLied: Did you see the mug?

Kelloggs: They’re just pounding orange juice.

Keidence: You don’t drink orange juice out of a mug?

AiLied: No, I do not.

AiLied: This is like that one episode of Code Geass.

Kelloggs: This seems abusive. See, this is like the reverse of why women quit the military academy. Because everybody was harassing them. This is misandry, is what I’m saying.

Kelloggs: Wait, is that the drill from Gurren Lagann?

PumpkinMochi: Yes.

AiLied: They’re the size of her head!

Kelloggs: That’s what you’re concerned about? They just need to make her head bigger to distract from her chest.

PumpkinMochi: He’ll hide in the bathroom! Or wherever this is.

AiLied: That’s not a bathroom.

Kelloggs: Does your bathroom have a grandfather clock in it?

PumpkinMochi: No.

Kelloggs: This is a shitty hiding spot. They’re gonna change now, aren’t they?

Kelloggs: What the fuck kind of underwear are you wearing?

AiLied: What’s wrong with it?

Kelloggs: You just go around school all day in that frilly shit?

AiLied: If they like it, why not?

Kelloggs: Owned!

 

AiLied: Now that I think about, the ribbon in her hair is kinda weird. It’s not holding anything up, is it?

Kelloggs: I don’t like it. Like, you either go with the straight up strap or go full-on bunny ears. You can’t half ass it like that.

AiLied: It’s kinda like a headband.

Kelloggs: Yeah, but headbands don’t have bows on them.

PumpkinMochi: Yay blackmail!

AiLied: That is pretty cool.

AiLied: I love her face.

Kelloggs: I too love when she has a donut in her face.

AiLied: Ehhh… not her. All the food goes straight to her boobs.

Kelloggs: Well, that’s the best place for it to go.

Kelloggs: Oh my god, her hair’s down. It’s adorable.

Kelloggs: She knows what’s up. Kissing makes babies.

Kelloggs: Oh my god, she has glasses. Best episode! I love this show!

PumpkinMochi: That outfit…

Kelloggs: She’s got Leia buns going on, it’s great. Also, Lisha looks kinda like Tensai from Nanana.

Kelloggs: This guy is so much better than Lux.

AiLied: What! Is this the Kelloggs of the show?

Kelloggs: I can’t pull off that hairstyle.

AiLied: He looks like Edward Elric because of the hair, that’s what been bothering me. Also, the red coat.

Kelloggs: Yes, and Edward Elric was good. So she should marry him instead.

AiLied: No, he’s like an evil Elric.

Kelloggs: He’s pretty baller. We should call him that from now on.

 

Episode 4

PumpkinMochi: Hey, it’s Krulcifer.

Kelloggs: Her name is Krururulcifer.

AiLied: She’s actually really flat.

PumpkinMochi: I know. I’ve seen art, AiLied.

Kelloggs: I’m just saying what if Krulcifer had a dick.

AiLied: I mean, she doesn’t but okay.

PumpkinMochi: You don’t know that.

AiLied: Pretty sure I do. I’ve got a trap radar.

PumpkinMochi: You know how some anime girls can hide their boobs, what if this is like that. Krulcifer could take off her skirt and a huge dick could flop out.

AiLied: I actually read something like this the other day.

Kelloggs: I like this one, she’s good.

AiLied: The mischievous one?

Kelloggs: Yeah. Playful mischief is good.

Kelloggs: Oh hello Fluffy.

PumpkinMochi: Jesus Christ!

Keidence: Look at the width of her shoulders.

AiLied: I’m okay with that.

Kelloggs: See, she’s good.

Kelloggs: Time to explain more backstory.

 

AiLied: It’s Edward Elric!

Kelloggs: And also Edward Elric.

AiLied: No, that’s his dad.

PumpkinMochi: Yeah, that’s Hohemheim.

Kelloggs: But he has no beard.

AiLied: He shaved it. It’s an important meeting.

Kelloggs: I’ll adjust your Drag-Ride if you know what I mean. It’s like Tatsuya adjusting his sister’s CAD or whatever.

AiLied: This girl has watched too much Gurren Lagann.

AiLied: That is a hopeful bluray shot there.

PumpkinMochi: Lord what?

Kelloggs: This is Edward Elric, he will be observing you all today.

AiLied: They’re doing a good job of making him really unlikable. They even gave him ominous music.

AiLied: That’s a fancy way of saying you lost.

Kelloggs: Hey, I don’t know. Rubio won Iowa by being in third place. It’s all about the expectations. If people expect him to be last and he was third, then that’s good.

PumpkinMochi: It’s okay to finish first or third, but second… nobody ever remembers who finishes second. I heard that from someone.

Kelloggs: Yeah, I forget who.

Kelloggs: What is that thing?

AiLied: This feels like a video game.

PumpkinMochi: Yeah, it’s like a cut scene.

Kelloggs: I often do feel like with a lot of these action shows, I wish this was a video game. Watching people fight is less interesting than playing a game.

Keidence: If watching people fight isn’t as interesting as playing, then they’re doing it wrong.

Kelloggs: She’ll be fine, she’s very aerodynamic.

Kelloggs: She’s a terrible shot though.

AiLied: This is what happens when people’s aimbots are disabled.

Kelloggs: Stranded with Krulcifer. Winning! Also, do they play giant croquet here?

Keidence: Yeah, that’s what I thought.

AiLied: I don’t know if this show feels rushed. I feel like they’re running through things really fast. It just feels underdeveloped.

PumpkinMochi: You know what else is underdeveloped? Her chest.

Kelloggs: Zing!

AiLied: Her chest is fine. I think.

Kelloggs: So what I’m saying is that Krulcifer likes her heroes the way she likes her coffee. Hot and in her mouth.

AiLied: I’m okay with this.

PumpkinMochi: I thought you were gonna say bland and watered-down.

Kelloggs: That would have been a good answer too.